Megymelly: April 2007

Pretty sweet, huh?

Actually, it's not a new car. We don't buy new cars. Major waste of money. Seriously, even car dealers don't buy new cars.

We figured out some things w/ our finances and much to our happy surprise, we actually CAN afford a minivan. So yeah, I joined the mini-van crowd. No more banging my head, no more strange contortions of back and arms to get Maddie into the center-placed carseat base every day. No more piling up large boxes from Sam's Club as high as Maddie's carseat canopy. My poor baby, she looked like just another huge bottle of laundry detergent. So we bought a 2006 Toyota Sienna. Not particularly loaded, but it's got what we need. No, no DVD player. Not necessary. My kids will not need a screen in front of them 24/7, if I can help it. Neat 3rd row seats that fold into the floor. Hugely roomy. Very good safety rating; in the event of an accident the car actually morphs into a big bean bag chair and rocks you to sleep while playing a lullaby. Ok, perhaps not. But it does have an airbag pretty much everywhere you can put one.

And we paid a couple thou less than the kelly blue book price. So it's all good. The only sad thing is that we had to say goodbye to Bob's Saturn L200. Nice car. Mid-sized sedan. But stuff was falling apart. Of course we JUST had it in the shop to fix the fan blower...but I doubt they'd have been happy to see that it didn't work when we traded it in. And who's car is it, this new one? Well, for the time being, it's MINE, baby. Bobby was a little surprised and bummed to realize that it really wouldn't make sense to buy a big minivan for carting around Maddie and all her paraphernalia only to have him drive it to work and me still take the Maddie show to Shannon's every day in my tiny Saturn SL2. If I'm 5'4'' and I'm bumping my head...yeah, not happening. BUT he's always the driver when we go places together, mainly cause I know he likes to drive and I couldn't care less. And when we go back to school in September it'll be his car, because Nana's coming here to watch Maddie. And I hate driving big cars. I hate the idea of one person in a huge gas-guzzler, I hate the idea of parking it on a street...I'll get used to it. Bob says it drives like a sedan. I haven't driven it yet. Maybe I'll take it to church tomorrow...new members class starts tomorrow. Can't I just say "sign me up?" darn it? Anyway, NEW CAR!!! YAY! I kind of embrace the whole Mini-Van Club image anyway. I'm uncool enough already that it doesn't bother me to be thought of as uncool on the road. And proud of it, btw.

On other fronts, school is going good. My sub was a major Choral person and now my kids sing better than they used to. I'm half jealous that she could accomplish this... and I half don't give a damn because my kids now have no discipline whatsoever and the younger grades are re-enacting Lord of the Flies. I do intend to look into some more choral techniques so they at least don't go down-hill.

I'm enjoying the new ABC show "Notes from the Underbelly". Of course I had to tape the pilot episode because it was on at 10, and I would be crazy to stay up watching TV until 11. On a weeknight. It's basically 30-somethings whining about how horrible your life is after you have a baby, and then in the end they'll probably discover that it's not so bad and blah blah blah, with funny situations. But OH, your marriage is over and you'll never have sex again and you'll never have money again and your body goes to hell and you lose all your friends and you never have time for yourself again and OH my GAWD...

Insert dose of reality here:
Marriage: Mine's actually better post-birth. Honest. We really approached this challenge as a team and we're appreciating each other's help and company through it. There's also a lot of things I never thought I'd see a man just jump up and do, and Bob's done them from the beginning. You grow an new appreciation for someone who will change 10 poopy diapers in a row so that you don't have to get out of the hospital bed once.

Sex: None of your dang business, but the impression they give you on this show is total crap. Your sex life is not over. Far from it. I bet a lot changes once your kid can say, walk down the hall and open your bedroom door on her own, though. *note to self: check & see if bedroom door has lock*

Money:Just budget, people. Budget before you have the kid, budget once the kid arrives, budget. Just look at how much you make and what your expenses are and decide how much you can spend on everything and then don't spend more than that. Duh. We just bought a NEW CAR (see above - yay!) so we're not destitute yet, clearly. Talk to me when she wants to go to an out-of-state private college and we might have another story.

Body: well, yeah, your body changes. My husband's body, for example, lost about 25 pounds because he was eating healthy right along with me. My genetic make-up seems to have caused the metabolic rate of a manatee, so I just didn't really gain while I was pregnant and on a really strict diabetic diet. Being off that diet now isn't helping much, though. That, and I really really really like Mexican food. And I think running is worse than Chinese water torture. Body Shmody. Moving on...

Friends: I went out and made a bunch of friends because I home all day and lonely as hell. Now that I'm back to work I actually have a lot more to talk about with my work friends, because they all have kids under 4, and I'm now in that club. Old friends probably just marvel and shake their head at crazy Meg for having a kid "so young", but people who cared enough to find out about my life that much in the first place care enough not to be too harshly judgmental, and a few friends have even expressed some jealousy about my cute little pumpkin here, so I'm calling it a win.

Time for yourself: Be a stay-at-home mom and kiss your me-time goodbye, in my opinion. You're on 24/7. I now have a lot more time for myself now that I'm working, because I have this fabulous thing called a "prep" period, where I do what I need to do. Sometimes it's grade stuff, sometimes it's surf the web and read blogs or look at YouTube. Once they get a few months old you get a routine, they take naps, and they sleep through the night. She goes to bed around 8 and although that means I have about 2 hours to get stuff done and do stuff I want, I find myself wishing she'd stay up later. You'd happily give up some me-time to get more baby-time.

I really think that all these shows that depict having a baby as this life-shattering event are written by selfish 30 and 40-somethings in L. A. who have waited so long to start their family that they've become very entrenched in their own me-centered lives. After 10-20 years on your own as an adult, living exactly the way you want, yeah, it will be a major adjustment. (Oh dear Lord, you're not the most important person in your world anymore! Whatever will you do?) Honestly, my long-winded point is that they make it look WAAAAY worse than it is, and they're jaded anyway because the longer you wait to bring a kid into your world, the harder it is to make room in that world for said kid.

Actually, the writing on the show was good, and if I can resist the urge to throw something at the TV whenever the self-centered main female character is on, I'll probably keep watching.
Since they're now switching it to 8:30 at night.

One side note: I miss my pregnancy hair. The growth hormones give you thick-shiny, gorgeous hair that doesn't quit. Mine's falling out like crazy (don't worry, I've got plenty to spare) and is breaking off so much that I have these tiny stupid fuzzy nests at my hairline. That goes away too, but not for several more months, I'm told. I miss my preggers hair, though.

So where was I before I went nuts on the new ABC show that whines about having babies? Monday I start the long-ass haul to the end of the year. Memorial Day is it, the only extra day off from now till June 21st (my last day of school and my wedding anniversary).
Gonna be a nice day.

Night!